Detox day 3 – my tummy is so flat its practically concave

Well thats a lie.

As my eyes opened this morning, I whipped back the covers to see it for myself – my flat tummy! Hawk asked the same question, the excitement making his voice quiver (that’s a lie too, but makes the story so much better). It, of course, wasn’t flat. It wasn’t even close. What a disappointment!

Turns out, a Kayla Itsines body requires Kayla Itsines gymming. I guess I’ll tackle that next week. Its not for lack of energy, in fact I’m surprised that I do really have energy, its just that I’m still doing this detox in Winter and its still really cold to get out of bed in the mornings.

My motivational information email today from Juice Revolution said to remind myself today why I am doing this.
I can’t recall why I am.
My mind is a blurry mush hidden behind the dull pain of headache.
But, this evening, I was sort of reminded why as I stepped on the scale. Its 1,5kg’s down since Monday morning. No really. Ok, its probably just water (I can hear all you critics say before you even think it!), but still… inching closer to a goal weight that I last saw before my South America trip is super exciting, and motivating!

So, besides just a moan (which my team have had to endure all day long. I think they’re feeling this detox worse than I am) – today wasn’t all bad. Minus the non-flat-tummy result from the morning I mean.

Firstly, I genuinely am not hungry. Its incredible considering that on Day 1 the hunger burn that felt like my large intestine was eating my little intestine was rather intense, and now, on day 3, I’m actually unable to finish my juices. This may also be because something named ‘Green Refresh’ that has brocolli plus cucumber in it (yes, juiced together) is very difficult to finish 500ml of.

Secondly – on the note of cucumber. I may never eat it again. Today I went out to buy a toothbrush and toothpaste because I was scared I am starting to smell like cucumber. And that’s gross. Its a dumb vegetable fruit thing anyway.

I don’t miss coffee. I miss the act of coffee. I miss ordering my flat white, the barista getting it just right and sipping at my take away cup as I start up my macbook and check my morning mails or have a quick catchup with my work-person. I only have one cup a day (and yes, it comes with milk so I know its bad and blah blah) and I always thought I needed it to wake me up. Turns out, I don’t. I need it as a social crutch or something. Its like smoking. Without the lung cancer risk.

I don’t miss wine. By Tuesday I usually need a drink (ha! lets be honest, its by Monday that I drink). Work stress combined with traffic and also, generally someone pisses me off by Tuesday. So.. its Tuesday today, and I don’t have any craving for a glass of wine. (May be due to headache. Headache may also be reason why no one has pissed me off as I have been unable to focus on anyone for longer than 3 minutes.)

I don’t miss chocolate and sweets. After every lunch, I turn to my work-person and tell her I need a chocolate or a sweet treat. Sometimes she reveals ferrero rocher from her draw (she has a box that I’ve eaten my way through – she bants, and is incredible at it. Is bant a verb? Anyway). Sometimes she shrugs. I don’t think I’ve uttered the words to her once this week. A genuine non-sweet craving going on which is very odd for me.

While detoxing for some may be all about putting good things in, and nourishing your body. For me – its turning out to be a test of will-power (of which, I’ve been proven to have none previously).  I have two days left. I have the support of so many people in my office  (which makes it genuinely awesome) and on twitter (because where else can I moan to strangers?). I had to sit through a farewell breakfast, a farewell afternoon tea and tomorrow I have a farewell lunch, and its all really challenging. (Not just because it also involves saying goodbye to people, but all of these things include carbs that I can’t have!)

Oh, on the note of carbs – so I may not be missing the wine, chocolate or coffee… but the carbs. Oh the carbs. I’m afraid for any carb come the weekend, as it won’t last long.

So its 8.30pm and I’ve been in bed for half an hour already. This is because its yes, cold. But also because there is very little to do in the evenings if you’re not cooking and enjoying a meal. Our evenings are generally spent in the kitchen as we cook supper, and then around the dining table just the two of us talking about our days and discussing ideas, holidays, issues at work, things we’ve read.. you know… so adult of us. We sometimes stay there all evening. Its hard to prepare, or eat dinner around a dinner table when its a juice. Try and ‘chew’ the juice all you want. Its still juice and doesn’t warrant the candles or the placemats.

Cooking and eating are events. Without them, you have a lot of time on your hands to be… err, productive I guess. But sometimes you just want to sit at a dinner table with someone and talk some shit about your day over a glass of wine.



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