The child I may never know

You’ll have your father’s way with a paintbrush. And mine with x + y’s (and other scientific, mathematic or logistical equations – otherwise that was money poorly spent!). I hope you have our wanderlust. You’ll have my co-ordination to move on pointes, and your dad’s to move in adidas.

You’ll dance. I really hope you’re good at it. But even if you’re not, I hope you always do it. I hope that you dance in the car when the radio plays your best song even if it means awkwardly getting seen by people in the car next to you. I hope you know that if it wasn’t for dancing, and a Jamiroquai song – your dad and I would never have been together.

You’ll struggle to choose between Stellenbosch University and UCT. But I hope you choose one of them, and don’t pick Rhodes or something too far away from us. I hope its Stellenbosch, so that you know where it all started. And I hope you do honours at UCT. So you get the best of both worlds.

You’ll walk down the aisle on your dad’s arm in a dress that is truly you – even if its in colour, short, or has no frills or fuss. You’ll wait patiently at the end of the aisle for your bride with all of our support. Either way, I hope you don’t do it too early, but that when you do – its because you fell into the magical kind of love that makes you want to dance in the rain together and lie on your back under the stars and talk all night. I hope that I am able to graciously let you go as you start a new family when you marry. I hope I don’t become that MIL, but I hope you know how hard that will be.

You’ll have one Romeo & Juliet type love. And I hope you’ll know that this type of love affair always ends badly. But its still worth experiencing.

You’ll know the importance of talking. And I hope you’ll base all your relationships on the meeting of minds, your ability to communicate openly and honestly with a person… amongst other things of course.

You’ll make mistakes. Sometimes they’ll be on purpose. Sometimes they’ll be an accident. You will be forgiven by those who really love you. And those that don’t forgive, are better off not in your life any more.

You’ll break the rules as a kid, and we’ll catch you out and you’ll probably regret it. You’ll break the rules as an adult. And you’ll know that sometimes, its worth it.

You’ll smile at personal jokes and laugh at inopportune times. You’ll make others laugh with you. You’ll realise early that you have plenty to smile about, as every day we’ll smile at you – our greatest gift.

For all the things I know you’ll be and do, I already love you. Even though I may never get to meet you.


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